What if you were in charge?

What would be different about how the world works if you had the power to design it from scratch?

• What would symbolize success in your world?

• Would material things matter as much as they do in our current world, or would other aspects of life be more valued?

• Would wealth matter?

• How would health be defined? Power? Friendships? Spirituality?

Growing up in this long-established world can make us believe there are only a few options for how to live a good life. Particularly in the U.S., we’re encouraged to believe that options only exist in pairs: good/bad, smart/dumb, ugly/beautiful, liberal/conservative, rich/poor, healthy/unhealthy, success/failure, etc. But in fact, nearly every part of life exists on a spectrum.

There are millions of ways to be human, but we can’t seem to escape the “norms” because our minds are so effective at picking up cues from the people and cultures around us. We adapt to blend in because to blend in is to be safe and accepted. But what happens when the adaptations leave us feeling hollow, unfulfilled and burnt out?

That’s where Neuro-Social Sovereignty comes in: If you want to recreate your world to live on your own terms, you’ll need your full neural resources ready to back you up. Otherwise, your anxiety is sure to sabotage you.

I’ve experimented with a number of strategies to find the right balance between growth and anxiety.

• Some of my strategies worked fabulously but proved to be hurdles to reaching my goals (i.e. holing up in the safety of my home to the detriment of friendships and opportunities for growth).

• Others shot me up the ladder to success but drained me of all enthusiasm for life (i.e. pretending to be someone I’m not so that people will hire me, like me or even notice me).

Holing up made my nervous system happy but escalated my self-doubt to new heights. But pretending to be someone else was worse: It decimated my ability to trust myself (and even know myself) while also spinning my anxiety out of control.

With the rapid healing I’ve experienced over the past year, I’ve begun to finally establish a felt sense of internal safety strong enough to live aligned with who I really am and what I truly need. Here’s what my old strategies were missing:

1. Self-trust

2. Nervous system health

I started building internal resilience by bringing online the parts of my nervous system with which I’d lost touch, and suddenly, it started to feel more possible to say what I really want to say, stand up for myself, set boundaries and honor my intuition – key elements of self-trust.

Here’s what I’ve learned: Your nervous system is where your anxiety lives. Your nervous system is also the most resilient and adaptive system in your body, making it the most impactful route toward change. It’s easy to train, rehabilitate and strengthen – it just takes daily commitment. You know, like brushing your teeth.

So if you’re ready to spark change at the nervous system level so that you can live the life that truly serves you best, we should talk. Make today the day you start rewriting your rules.